


Erase Me

by AshKnight



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Swan Queen - Freeform, swanqueen - Freeform, swendgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-05-17 16:50:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5878285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshKnight/pseuds/AshKnight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Semi-Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind AU.  Emma and Regina have a messy breakup and decide to have their memories of each other erased.  Emma moves to Boston, but something in her life is missing, so she returns to Storybrooke looking to fill the void.  Despite the enthusiastic discouragement from her best friend Ruby, Emma finds herself unknowingly falling for her former lover once again.  SwanQueen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: HETSEX and alternate pairings included. (Sorry. It was relevant to the plot.) No worries, though. SWENDGAME.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" the doctor asked, a look of concern on his face. "This isn't reversible. Once we do this, you can't go back."

"I don't want to go back. I want her gone," the woman replied seriously. "I  _need_ her gone."

"Alright, Emma. If you're positive, then we'll go ahead. We'll do it tonight when you're asleep."

"Great. The sooner the better."

Normally, Doctor Whale would have been fine with his job. He would have had no second thoughts. But he knew this woman, and she had become a friendly acquaintance. Though he was far from used to getting close to people, he cared about the sheriff.

"Have you told your friends and family? If they bring up your relationship-"

"They know. They're on board."

"Really?"

"Well…" the blonde said slowly. "Mary Margaret is… concerned. But they support me in my decision, and everyone we know is willing to go along with it. I'm leaving for Boston next week anyway. When is Regina having this done?"

"Tomorrow night. Don't worry about her. Worry about you."

"Well, I shouldn't have to worry, right, Whale? You're gonna take care of it."

"Yeah. We'll take care of it."

* * *

**ONE WEEK PRIOR**

"Fucking erase me then!" Emma screamed, picking up the nearest vase of flowers and throwing it toward the wall.

The vase fell short and shattered on the floor, and the flowers lay wet and wilted against the wood.

"You know what, Emma?" her lover hissed. "Fine. I fucking will."

* * *

The morning after the procedure, the blonde woke with a start, shaking and sweating. Though she could tell she'd been having a nightmare, she could remember none of it, though she tried hard to face it head on, she was unable to do so. Every time she felt herself on the edge of remembering, the thought slipped away and left her alone and in a panic.

Eventually, she calmed herself and made her way downstairs to fix herself a cup of coffee. It wasn't long before her phone rang.

"Hey, Em," her friend said into the phone.

"Hey, Rubes. What's up?"

"Not… Not much. You… um… you okay?"

"What? Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

There was a long pause on the other end of the line before the woman replied, "I don't know. I just got… uh… a weird feeling is all. You sure you're alright?"

"Yeah. I had a fucked up nightmare last night, but I can't remember anything. I feel… I feel weird, you know? Just… kinda… void of feeling."

"Wow, Em… That's kinda heavy."

"Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean to unload that on you. It's just so strange. It's been so long since I've felt like this. It just… hit me all of the sudden."

"Do you want me to come over?"

"That'd be great, actually. I don't have to work, so… seeing you would be really nice."

"I'll be right over."

* * *

"I don't want you to leave," Ruby told her friend softly. "I'm going to miss you."

"I just need to do this, you know? Things don't feel right here anymore, for some reason. I don't belong here."

"Of course you do, Em. You belong where I am!"

This made the blonde laugh, and she kissed the other woman's cheek.

"I love you, Rubes, but I gotta do this."

"Can't I come with you?"

"You have a life here. I don't. You need to stay."

With a sigh, Ruby leaned back against the couch and shut her eyes, thinking more than she could say.

* * *

**THREE MONTHS LATER**

"I can't do this, Graham," Regina sighed. "It just feels… wrong."

"Regina. Come on. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be together?"

"I… Look, Graham. It's not you. It's us. It just… It doesn't feel-"

Before she could finish the thought, the man's lips were on hers, and his hands were on her hips. At first, she tried to pull away, but when he held her firmly and looked into her eyes, she felt herself giving in.

"Graham," she sighed, when his lips continued to move against hers.

But no matter how hard she tried to resist him, she felt something drawing her closer.

As time went on, the two spent more and more time together, until he finally pushed too far.

"Come on, Regina. Why not?" he asked, as he lay in bed beside his lover. "I'm here almost every night anyway."

"We're not moving in together. It's been three months. I'm not-"

"You've known me forever."

"Yes, but we've only been-"

"What are you so afraid of?"

"I'm not afraid. I'm-"

"I love you, Regina," the man sighed heavily, sitting up in the bed and pushing his hands through his hair.

After what seemed like an eternity of silence, Regina was horrified to hear the quiet sound of her lover crying softly.

"Graham-" she breathed, laying her hand flat against the bare skin of his back. "I'm sorry."

"Don't," he snapped, jerking away from her. "Just don't, okay? You're a fucking stone wall, Regina. Every time things get serious, you pull away. Is it me? Is it something I did to push you away from me?"

"No! No… I just… I'm not… I'm not capable of loving, Graham. I'm just not."

"Then why are you doing this with me? Why spend almost every night with me?"

"I like you. I like what we have. It's just…  _love…_ I can't…"

Heart in his throat, he nodded.

* * *

Emma had adjusted to Boston, at least to a certain degree. But something was always missing for her, and that thought never left her mind. She'd met a few friends at work – she had taken a job as a deputy at the police department – but she wasn't close to any of them. Not the way she was close with Ruby. Of course, the two made phone calls every few days, but it only served to make Emma feel worse.

Eventually, she found herself sitting in a bar with a whiskey in her hand.

"What's got you down, sweetheart?" the handsome young bar tender asked.

"I left a place I used to call home because it didn't feel like home anymore. Now… Now I'm starting to miss it."

"Have another drink, love. This one's on me. It'll help you put your sorrow away, at least for an hour or so."

"Thanks."

As she downed the glass she'd purchased herself, he handed her another.

"We're closing up now, hun. I'm gonna have to shoo you out. You up for one more?"

"Nah. I should… should get home…" Emma slurred.

He smiled at her and shook his head, saying, "Yes, I suppose you've probably had a little too much already. That's my fault though. I apologize."

"It's fine," the woman laughed, setting her last empty glass down on the counter as she started to help herself off the bar stool.

When she began to sway slightly, the young man hurried out from behind the bar and helped steady her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

"You shouldn't go out alone. You're in no shape to even get in a cab. But, um… Listen… I've got an apartment two blocks from here, if you want to crash at my place. Nothing weird, of course. I'll fix the couch up for you and walk you home in the morning. What do you say?"

Her inhibitions kicked in, and she immediately shook her head, but when his hand squeezed her shoulder, she felt warmth spreading through her body. Against her better judgement, she followed him out.

Once they were back at his apartment, he did exactly as promised and fixed the couch up for her to sleep on, making sure to fluff the pillow before setting it down.

"You okay?" he asked with a smile, looking down at Emma, who had just sat down. When she nodded, he sat down beside her, saying, "I'm sorry I let you drink so much. I wasn't really counting for you, and I just… wanted to help you forget for a bit, you know?"

She nodded again and leaned into his shoulder, smiling back at him. As she shut her eyes and let her head drop to his shoulder, the young man raised his eyebrows in surprise. Not wanting to disturb her, given that she was clearly falling asleep, he tried to stay still, but when her hand pressed against his firm abdomen, he shivered.

"What's your name?" she mumbled.

"Listen, I'm just trying to help. I wasn't-"

"What's your name?"

"It's Jason."

"I like that."

"What's your name then?"

"I'm Emma."

"That's a pretty name."

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I do."

His smile was bright and charming, and when she looked up and saw it, she began smiling again too. It was good not to be alone. She fell asleep shortly after that, and he remained diligently awake for an hour or so until she woke up.

"Wow," she muttered. "What the hell?"

"You fell asleep. I just… I wasn't… I was just sitting here. I didn't want to wake you. You had too much to drink, and I didn't want you to have to walk home alone."

"That's… That's very sweet of you… Jason? You said your name was Jason, right? I remember that much at least."

"Yeah." When Emma didn't say much else, he offered, "You should get some proper sleep. I'll walk you home in the morning."

"I'm fine. I'm just gonna call a cab. I'm good now. Barely feeling a buzz. Okay, well… Maybe a little bit. But still. I can walk."

She tried to stand up, but the young man gently took her arm and urged her to remain seated.

"Please, stay."

"You're… You're very handsome," she told him, as she found herself staring up into his bright green eyes.

"Th-Thanks."

He looked nervous, and so was she, but she scooted a little closer anyway, feeling the sudden overwhelming urge to not be left alone.

"Don't go, okay? Sit with me."

"Alright..."

"It's okay. I don't bite."

He nodded and swallowed hard. Seeing that he was obviously a gentleman, Emma bit her lip and decided to take a chance.

She leaned in and pressed her lips against his.

Soon, she was naked, with her back pressed against couch cushions as he thrust himself into her, grunting loudly with each movement.

"Emma… Oh, fuck," he groaned, coming hard.

She was far from an orgasm when he pulled out and dropped his forehead to her collar bone, panting as his chest heaved.

"I haven't done that in so long."

Emma sighed and shut her eyes, leaning back against the pillow. To her surprise, though, he didn't pull away. He relaxed against her, once he'd caught his breath, and wrapped his arms around her. Though she'd been left sexually unsatisfied, the physical contact and what felt like affection was a relief, and it lulled her back to sleep.

In the morning, though, feeling embarrassed, she left in a hurry.

"Call me?" he asked timidly, as she stood in the doorway.

She shook her head and told him, "I can't."

* * *

"So… Is that it then?" Regina asked her lover, guilt written all over her face.

He wiped his eyes and shook his head.

"I don't care if you love me. I'll do anything to stay in your life, and I'll keep hoping that you'll change your mind."

When she noticed that his eyes were red from crying, she put her hand on his back again and softly said his name.

Wanting to pull away, but unable to resist the woman he was so deeply in love with, Graham sighed and fell back onto the bed, covering his eyes with his hands.

Regina moved her hand to his chest and whispered, "Come here."

As he rolled onto his side and curled himself against her, she wrapped her arms around his bare torso and pulled him closer, trailing her fingers up and down his back.

"Don't cry, okay?" she said softly. "It's going to be okay, Graham. I do care about you."

"Do you even get anything from this?"

"Yes. Your company is very meaningful to me."

"Does it even feel good? Being with me? Do you even want me here?"

"Graham, please. You know that I-"

"I want you to feel good when I touch you."

"Do you feel good when I touch you?"

"Yes, of course. You know that, Regina. But do  _you?_ "

"Yes…"

When he said nothing in reply, but began to breathe deeply, she pressed her nails into his back lightly and dragged them down, just above the curve of his ass, and stopped. He sucked in a surprised breath but didn't move. Despite the inappropriateness of her feelings at that particular moment, Regina's heart began to race, and her thighs clenched.

"Regina…"

His hand trailed over her bare abdomen in a hopeful plea for any kind of connection. Too aroused to decline, Regina gently tugged him on top of her and reached between his legs, stroking his length with her graceful hand and pumping him until he started to groan. It didn't take long for his hands to find her breasts, and as he worked one beneath his hand, she gasped, and her arousal pooled between her legs.

"Does this feel good?" she said softly, stopping her movements.

"Regina," he breathed heavily. "I want you."

"Take me."

She gasped again as his erection spread her core.

"Regina," he moaned, thrusting into her frantically.

It was too fast for her to enjoy. She was desperate to slow him down, so she gripped his hips firmly and pulled him forward, then pushed him away, setting her own pace, which drove him nearly insane with want.

"Regina, please," Graham gasped. "I need you."

"Make me come, Graham," she pleaded breathlessly. "Make me come."

He tried to slow himself, tried to stop, tried to hold it in, but with three more thrusts, he was done, and cried out as he spilled himself inside her.

"I'm s-sorry," he gasped as he slipped out of her, reaching between his legs and jerking himself, trying to make his member grow again. He did this to no avail, and his face grew bright red with embarrassment as he repeated, "I'm sorry, Regina. I-"

Ignoring him and his apologies, the woman squeezed her eyes shut and reached between her own legs to stroke her clit. When he saw this, Graham's eyes filled with tears of humiliation and frustration. It didn't take her long to climax by her own hand, and as soon as her muscles stopped contracting, she let out a sigh of relief.

"I'm sorry," he repeated. "Fuck… I'm… I didn't mean to-"

"It's fine."

"Do you… Can I try again? I… I think I can now…"

She looked over and slowly asked him, "Did you like watching me touch myself? Or did it make you jealous?"

"B-Both," he confessed. "It's sexy, but… I'm sorry…"

"Stop saying that."

"Will you let me try again?"

Praying that this time would be better – it usually was – she slid her hands over her own breasts and twisted her nipples.

"Why?" she asked seductively. "Are you getting hard again?"

He nodded shyly and automatically looked down at himself, finding a small tent in the sheets.

"Come here and use that wisely."

Nervous but ready and eager for another release – the sight of his lover naked and stretched out before him always made him hard – he positioned himself between her legs. When she reached out to stroke him though, he pushed her hands away.

"No," he told her. "I want to make it last this time. Tell me how you want me to fuck you."

"Just fuck me, Graham. Don't-"

"Tell me, Regina. I'll do it any way you want."

"Alright…" she said slowly, surprised by his offer of submissiveness.

Usually, their sex was intense, though not exactly passionate – at least, not for her – but he'd never been so tender or attentive to her needs. Then again, she'd never  _not_ come before, and he'd never found himself so embarrassed in his entire life.

Ready to take his length inside her and try the act again, she pulled her knees up and spread her legs wide.

"Come here, big boy," she urged him. "I want you inside me."

Graham's heart raced. She was usually silent and not to encouraging. Not so explicit. Her bluntness shocked and aroused him. Slowly this time, he moved his hips forward and used his right hand to guide himself to her entrance as his left hand supported his weight.

He groaned loudly as she took in his entire length, the lack of speed making the sensation more intense.

"Oh, God, that's good. You're so fucking tight."

"Move, baby. I want to feel you moving inside me."

He nodded his head and obediently began to rock his hips forward and back, working up a slow but steady pace that caused her to soak his whole cock and made his movements smooth and effortless. What wasn't effortless was maintaining that pace when Graham longed so intensely to speed up, to work himself to his release and to come inside her again.

"I love fucking you," he whispered, his voice breathy and shaken as he kissed the shell of her ear. "You feel so good."

"Harder, Graham."

He thrust himself deeper, pushing harder and harder each time, but kept the same slow pace, until she was finally moaning and gasping for breath.

"That's it, honey. Just like that," she cooed. "Ah, fuck! Baby, that's it. I'm gonna… I'm gonna-"

He knew was she was going to say, because he could feel it. She was coming for him, clenching around him, and thankfully, he made it long enough to finally get his own release. Feeling her contract made it too hard to hold back, and as she was bathing in her orgasm, he reached his own climax and finished inside her.

* * *

"I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER COME BACK!" Ruby screamed, throwing her arms around her friend as soon as the woman stepped out of her car.

"Well, here I am!" she said cheerfully.

But when she looked around, she was apprehensive.

"Looks… different."

"It's not. Nothing's changed, babe."

"Except me."

Looking worried, Ruby wrapped her arm around the blonde and pulled her into her side.

"I love you, kid."

"I'm not a kid," Emma laughed. "You're younger than me."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Anyway, let's get drinks!"

* * *

"Who's she?" Emma asked her friend, as she watched a petite brunette step into the establishment and head in their direction.

Ruby's heart stopped as she watched the mayor walk up to the bar.  _What the fuck do I say?_

"That's the mayor. Regina Mills."

"Is she new or something? Why don't I remember her?"

"She, uh… Um…"

"God, she's beautiful," the blonde breathed, blatantly staring as the woman ordered herself a cocktail and sat down a few stools away from her.

"Look, she's… She's taken, Em, and…"

"What?"

"She's got a boyfriend."

"But…"

"Yeah, I know. It's a tragedy. We'll find you someone, babe. Don't worry. Just… not her."

"She's out of my league anyway," Emma chuckled bitterly, looking down at the counter.

"Hey!" Ruby snapped, lifting the woman's chin. "Don't you dare say that! No one's out of your league. She's just taken, Em. That's all."

"Yeah. Alright."

The following night, they met at the bar again, and to both Emma and Ruby's surprise, the attractive brunette entered shortly after that had gotten settled and had started drinking. As soon as the other woman sat down, the blonde began to stare again.

"Emma, knock it off," Ruby hissed, nudging her shoulder. "You're practically drooling!"

"I can't help it. Jesus."

"Yeah, yeah. Alright. Just try not to make it so fucking obvious, yeah?"

After a few more drinks, the two friends were on the dance floor, staying close together as they moved to the music. Though Ruby prayed that it would distract her friend from staring at her former lover, Emma continued to glance over at the woman repeatedly every few minutes. It didn't take long for Regina to notice the way the blonde's hips swayed effortlessly. The mayor certainly wasn't one to dance, but it seemed to com naturally to Emma (even though she was rarely drunk enough to participate in the activity).

Finally, the woman decided that staring was not enough and stood to walk over to the other two beautiful women.

"Pardon me," Regina said, just loud enough to be heard over the music. "But I seem to have seen you staring."

Emma's heart stopped as she spun around, knowing all too well that the woman wasn't talking to her friend.

"I… I'm… I apologize. I was-"

"You're forgiven…" the brunette told her slowly. "But it'll cost you a dance."

 _Oh, no,_ Ruby was thinking.  _What now?_

But there was nothing she could do to stop the chemistry between them.

As "taken" as Regina was, the blonde was captivating. Besides, it was just a dance. Just one dance. With a beautiful girl, who had a beautiful smile and beautiful hair…

Emma stepped forward, shaking Regina from her thoughts and her guilt. Then, as the brunette put her hands on her hips, she began to dance.

[LINE BREAK]

"Oh, my  _God,_ " the blonde gasped, falling back onto her bed as her friend sat down beside her. "I  _have_ to see her again."

"Emma," Ruby sighed. "You can't. She's  _taken._ "

"Well she can't be very happy if she's dancing with other women at a bar!"

"It was just a dance! And who said she's with a woman?"

"Huh?" Emma asked, sitting up and looking her friend in the eyes.

"She's with a guy, Em. Not that it matters."

"No  _way_ does she eat cock."

"Sorry. She does."

"FUCK!" the blonde screamed, falling back against the pillows again.

"Oh, come on! She's just one woman. We'll find you someone, Em. You're beautiful and strong and smart and anyone would be crazy not to want you. I know you're lonely, but-"

"Fuck off, Ruby."

"You are! I know you are. And that's okay. But getting stuck on her is only going to end up hurting you. I promise."

* * *

"Oh, shit," Emma gasped as she ran directly into a woman on the street. When she looked up and saw that it was the mayor, her cheeks turned red, and she immediately sputtered, "I'm s-sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's perfectly alright, dear."

The blonde's knees nearly gave out as the woman looked back at her with dark chocolate eyes.

"I, uh…"

"You were great the other night," Regina told her slowly. "At the bar."

"I, um… I wouldn't remember. I was pretty drunk."

 _Nice job, liar,_ she scolded herself. At least she didn't have to admit to having the time of her life.

"Hmm. Interesting. You didn't seem that drunk to me."

"Yeah, well, I, uh… I hold my liquor well…"

"Apparently so."

Regina's sly, playful smile made her weak.

"Anyway," the brunette said. "I'd better be going."

"Yeah. Important mayor stuff, I'm sure," Emma chuckled with a smile.

"Not… Not exactly."

"Oh?"

"I should go…"

Suddenly, Regina felt guilty for the way she was staring. A dance was one thing, but this? This woman… She was…

"I'll see you around."

"I certainly hope so."

Walking away from each other, they both blushed.

* * *

The next time they saw each other at the bar, Regina was with Graham, and his hands were all over her the entire night.

One she was back in her own room, with her best friend sitting beside her, Emma exclaimed, "He's not even that attractive!"

"He kind of is," Ruby laughed.

"It's not funny!"

"It is, a little."

"Whatever. I have no chance. None. Zero. But  _fuck..._ She's so beautiful…"

"Emma, snap out of it. Let it go."

"I can't help it."

With a sigh, her friend replied, "I know."

* * *

Luckily for Emma, that Friday night, Regina appeared at the bar alone.

As soon as she saw the woman walk in, Ruby groaned, saying, "I think we need to either stop drinking or find a different bar."

"No way," Emma breathed. "Not if I get to see her."

They kept to themselves for a while, until finally, Regina appeared beside them and said, "Hey."

"H-Hey," the blonde suttered. "How are you?"

"I'd be better after another dance with you."

 _Ohhhhh, boy,_ Ruby sighed to herself.  _This is_ _ **bad.**_

"Well, I suppose if it will improve your day… I can't decline," Emma told her with a smile, standing up and taking the woman's hand when it was offered.

They danced for a while, until Emma started to stare at the woman's lips.

Suddenly, when she noticed, Regina was not quite so confident.

"What?" the brunette asked, stopping her movements but leaving her hands on the woman's hips.

"You look beautiful."

"Oh, don't say that."

"Why?"

"You're going to make me want to do more than just dance with you, and I can't."

"And why not?"

"I have a… a partner."

"Then why are you dancing with me?"

"It's just a dance, right?"

"I don't know. Is it?"

Regina turned red and began to step back, but Emma stepped forward until their bodies were closer together.

"How good can he possibly be?" Emma pressed, looking down into the smaller woman's eyes.

"Not that good," the brunette laughed bitterly, stepping back. "I should go…"

"Alright. Thank you for the dance. Drive safe tonight."

"Bye, Beautiful."

* * *

"I can't stop thinking about her, Ruby."

"Yeah, I can tell."

"No, I'm serious. I can't breathe or blink without her showing up behind my eyelids."

"That's gross, Em."

"Don't be a bitch, Ruby."

"Sorry," the brunette muttered, looking down at her feet.

"Whatever. It's never gonna happen anyway."

"You're right. So try to move on, okay? We'll find you someone else, and-"

"I don't want someone else! I'm not desperate for a partner, Ruby! I'm just… infatuated with her. I don't know what it is. I can't explain it. I just…"

"I get it," Ruby sighed. "I do. I just want to see you happy, okay? And as long as you hold on to this fantasy, you won't be."

"Whatever."

"Stop saying that. You sound like you're five."

"Fuck off!"

"Em, this really isn't like you. Why are you getting so pissy?"

"Because you're being an insensitive douchebag."

"Alright. Fine. I'm leaving. Get your shit together, Emma, and stop fawning over a taken woman."

* * *

Emma walked into the bar alone that night, and when she saw the mayor sitting beside the handsome young man, she immediately turned around and walked back out. As much as she wanted to see the beautiful woman, the last thing on Earth she wanted to watch was her interacting with her lover.

Back at her apartment, she flopped onto her bed and stared at the ceiling.

"What the hell is it about this girl that I can't shake?"

Before she could ponder the question more, her phone rang.

"Hey, asshole. What's up?"

"Nice," her friend answered. "Real nice. Anyway, get dressed, if you're not already, and meet me at the library."

"What? Why?"

"You've got a date. Be there or be square, bitch."

Of course, Emma was tempted to lie in the bed until two in the afternoon the next day, but she fought the urge to shut down and mope. Instead, she did exactly as she was told and made her way to the library. As soon as she walked in, her eyes widened.

"Oh, wow," she breathed, standing beside her friend, who had greeted her at the door.

"Don't drool, Emma," Ruby said loudly. "It's not polite."

Immediately shoving her elbow into the woman's side, causing her to grunt in pain but laugh nonetheless, Emma stepped forward, towards the woman who was clearly meant to be her date, and extended her hand.

"Hi," she said softly. "I'm Emma."

"So I heard," the brunette told her with a playful smile. "I'm Belle."

"That's a beautiful name."

"It's nothing special, really, but thank you. That's sweet of you to say."

"So, um… I, uh…"

"Ruby told me a lot about you. You sound like a very-"

"Oh, boy."

Belle laughed and shook her head, saying, "Nothing bad, of course. Those secrets are for you to share."

When the woman winked at her, Emma blushed.

"Well?" Ruby cut in. "Get on with it, you two. Start making babies. I wanna be an aunt already! What the hell is taking you so long?"

"RUBY!" Emma shouted, turning and advancing on her friend. "Piss off,  _right now._ "

"Some thank you that is! I only found you an amazingly gorgeous, intelligent, sweet, kind-hearted angel for a date."

It was Belle's turn to blush as she replied, "Hush, Ruby. You flatter me."

"All in a day's work, darling. Pissing off and romancing ladies in the span of five minutes is all in a day's work."

The soon-to-be couple rolled their eyes.

"Alright, Ruby," Emma warned her. "Time to go."

"Have fun, you two! Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

"Well, that doesn't narrow it down very much, does it?" her friend teased.

Ruby rolled her eyes and left the library laughing.

"So, um…" the blonde started. "I'm sorry to say that Ruby's never actually told me anything about you."

"I'm relatively new here. Just moved in a couple months ago."

Emma smiled softly and replied, "Just moved back here a little bit ago. It's been a surprisingly rough adjustment. I feel like… I don't know. Like I've forgotten everything about this place. Some things are so familiar, like I've known them my whole life, but other things are just… gone."

"I can imagine that must be pretty stressful. You probably feel like you're new here too, then."

"Sometimes I do, yeah."

"Then I guess we have that in common."

When Belle offered her a smile, Emma smiled back.

* * *

"It was lovely to spend time with you tonight," read the text message Emma received when she got home that evening.

"I can say the same about you," she messaged back with a smile.

And it was true. Something about Belle made her feel more comfortable. More relaxed. But something else was missing, although she couldn't explain what.

Before she could wonder what the woman would say next, her phone rang, and she answered it immediately.

"Yes, Ruby. What?"

"Well? How was it? Do I have a niece or a nephew yet?"

"Oh, my God. Stop."

"Well?!"

"It was great, okay? She's wonderful. I just…"

"What? What could you possibly have to complain about?! She's perfect!"

"Why didn't you tell me about her before?"

"Because you were so fucking wrapped up in your little fantasy about the stuck-up mayor that I wouldn't have been able to get your attention with  _anything!_ "

"Whatever."

"Seriously, though. Did you guys make out or what?"

"That is  _none_ of your business."

"Aww, c'mon, Em! I thought we told each other everything!"

"If you're so interested in her, why don't you fucking date her?"

"Ehh. She's not my type," Ruby joked. "I'm more into blondes."

"Oh, stop it."

"Okay, but really. Why can't we talk about this?"

"Because you're pissing me off."

"You're so uptight. What happened to you in Boston?"

"Nothing!"

"Jesus. Alright. Whatever. I'll let you go. You're welcome, by the way."

"Wait. Ruby, I'm sorry. I'm just… I'm caught up on this Regina thing."

"Don't be. Belle is perfect. You'd be a fool to let her go."

"I know."

"Good. Don't fuck this up, yeah? Let go of the fantasy and start living the dream."

* * *

Given that Emma was avoiding the bar like the plague, she managed to also avoid seeing the mayor over the next few weeks. Her time was spent mostly with Belle, who was herself rather enchanting and had certainly done more than just capture the blonde's attention.

"You're wonderful, Emma," the woman sighed, resting her hand on Emma's thigh. "I really enjoy our time together."

"You know…" the blonde began with a smile. "You still haven't shown me around the library."

"Oh! You're right! I did say I would do that, didn't I?"

"You did."

Once they entered the building and flicked on the lights, Belle's face immediately brightened.

"It's surprisingly clean in here," Emma commented. "Most libraries I've been in are pretty dusty."

"Well, I certainly do spend a lot of time trying to keep it that way."

"You do a great job."

Belle smiled at her, then grabbed her hand and began to tug her toward the back of the building, urging her, "Come with me."

"So what section is this?" Emma asked, when her date finally stopped.

"My favorite! Fantasy."

The blonde smiled and shook her head, saying, "Should've known."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that you're straight out of a fairy tale. Why wouldn't the fantasy genre be your favorite?"

Instantly, Belle turned red and looked away, but Emma continued to grin until she finally looked back up and met her gaze.

"So what's your favorite book?" the taller woman finally asked.

"Oh, that's easy!" the brunette cried, rushing over to the sliding ladder attached to the wall.

After moving it over one section, she climbed it and reached up to the top shelf, just barely managing to grab a large hardcover book with a maroon dust jacket.

"What's it about?"

"It's about a princess who rescues a prince for a horrible curse."

"Wait, the princess rescues the prince?"

"Mhmm. That's why I love it."

As Belle turned to step off the ladder, though, her foot slipped, and she fell forward. With quick reflexes, Emma caught her in her arms and held her upright as the woman regained her footing. Even then, neither pulled away.

"S-Sorry," Belle stammered, staring into deep green eyes.

"No, it's… It's okay."

When the brunette's hands fell to Emma's waist, she shivered.

"Emma…"

"Yes?"

"May I… May I kiss you?"

With a playful smile, the blonde replied, "I thought you'd never ask."

* * *

A few dates later, as Emma stood in the librarian's doorway to say goodnight, they found themselves entangled in each other's arms, locked in a series of kisses.

"Come inside?" Belle whispered softly, kissing the shell of her ear.

Emma's stomach flipped, so her muscles stiffened, and, involuntarily, she pulled away.

"Shit," the brunette said quickly. "I'm sorry. I just meant…"

"No, it's… I…"

"It's okay. I understand. I'll bid you goodnight now, fair maiden."

Belle forced a smile, but it was obvious to Emma that it was fake, so she stepped closer and took both of the woman's hands in her own.

"Belle," she sighed. "Please. It's not you. You didn't do anything wrong. I just-"

"Please, don't. Just go, okay? I'm already embarrassed. Don't make it worse."

With a weak nod, Emma turned to leave.

* * *

"I'm sorry," Emma said in a text message. When no reply came, she added, "I really am."

After three days of no word from the woman, Emma dialed her friend's number.

"I really fucked this up, Ruby."

"What happened?"

"She asked me to come inside a few nights ago, and I… I just froze. I panicked… She panicked. It was just… It was just a mess, and when I tried to explain, she asked me to leave. I texted her to apologize, but… I haven't heard anything back. I tried to call her too, but it rang once and then went right to voicemail. I guess she doesn't want to hear from me."

"I'm just she's just confused as to why in God's name you'd be hesitant to sleep with her."

"She didn't ask me to sleep with her! She just asked me to come inside! I didn't know what to do. I got nervous. I was…"

"We both know what 'come inside' means for adults."

With a sigh, Emma replied, "I know. I just… didn't know if I was ready for that. It's stupid. I should have just… Ugh. I ruin everything."

"You don't ruin everything."

"I get close to people, and I run. You know that, Rubes. I just… freak out and get scared. I just can't shake the feeling that… that there's someone out there for me. But that I'm going to push them away before I even know they're the one."

There was a pause on the other end of the line before her friend replied, "I seriously think she's just confused and embarrassed. You probably made her feel like she shouldn't have asked."

"I know! But I didn't  _mean_ to! And I apologized! What the hell do I do now?"

"Send her flowers."

"That's silly."

"It's not. Do it."

"But I-"

"Fine. I'll just do it and sign your name."

"Ruby!"

"Do it yourself, then! She deserves a better apology than a text message."

Sighing, Emma conceded, "You're right."

* * *

She sent the flowers, as agreed, and later that same day, there was a knock on her door. To Emma's surprise, when she opened it, Belle was standing before her.

"I'm sorry," the woman blurted quickly. "I just panicked. I know I shouldn't have asked. It was too soon. I just. It just sort of… came out…"

" _You're_ sorry? Are you kidding me? You did  _nothing_ wrong, Belle! I'm the asshole. I-"

"You're not an asshole. I-"

"Yes, I am!"

"Look, I-"

"Did you, um… Did you get the flowers?"

"Yes, I got the flowers," Belle told her, chuckling softly at the way Emma had interrupted their little spat. "They're beautiful."

"So are you." When the brunette didn't say anything in response and simply began to blush brightly, Emma said softly, "Come here," and held her arms out.

They embraced, and their eyes met again as they pulled away, causing Belle's stomach to flip. Then, Emma caught her lips slowly. The kiss progressed, the heat of it surprising both of them. The blonde quickly kicked the door shut and continued to kiss the woman deeply as she pressed her against the wall. When her partner whimpered, she felt warmth radiate from her core.

It had been months since she'd slept with anyone. In fact, the only person she'd slept with since leaving Storybrooke was the bartender back in Boston. Now that she had a sweet, caring, and beautiful woman in her arms, the urge was suddenly driving her mad.

As soon as Belle heard the noise escape her, she began to pull away, but Emma held her tightly and caught her lips again.

"Belle, wait," she whispered. "It's okay."

A sigh of relief fell from the brunette's pink lips as her hands fell down to her lover's hips. She breathed the woman's name, then slid her hands into Emma's back pockets and pulled her closer.

"Wait," she finally muttered, breaking the next kiss. "Are you sure this is-"

"If you want to, I want to."

"I… I want to."

That was all Emma needed to hear before lifting the woman into her arms and carrying her to the bedroom, where she gently laid the woman down on the sheets. Lust raging inside of her, the blonde quickly stripped her partner of her clothing, and Belle did the same for her in return. Lying naked in each other's arms, Emma felt some relief, but the empty place inside her still lingered and gnawed at her heart. But it wasn't long before Belle's fingertips brushed her hips and tore her from her thoughts of loneliness.

Slowly, Emma ran her hands up and down the woman's body, savoring every sensation, especially when her palms began to rub her lover's breasts. The moan that she earned in response made her wet. Knowing what she was doing to her partner urged her on and heightened her own arousal. As soon as her fingers found the woman's clit, Belle did the same for her.

Their breaths became frantic and labored as they made love. Belle was quick to orgasm, taking nearly no time to reach the apex of her release, and her entire body tensed then went limp in Emma's arms. Just as the blonde thought that Belle was going to leave things there, one of her hands reached around to grab her backside, and the other resumed its position inside her core and continued to move.

"Belle," Emma gasped, as she realized that she was about to finish for the first time in far too long.

"Yeah, baby. Come for me."

The blonde moaned loudly as she felt her release and rode it out, rocking against her lover's hand as the sensations slowed. When it was over, she relaxed against Belle's body and drew slow, deep breaths.

"I… I should go," the brunette told her, seemingly out of nowhere.

"What?"

"I should leave."

"But why? Was it that horrible?"

Emma looked horrified.

"No! No. Emma… I just… I don't want to intrude or take things too-"

"Please, stay."

Belle couldn't help but smile as she nodded slowly and Emma pulled her gently back down into her arms.


	2. Chapter 2

Unfortunately for Emma, the reality was short lived, and her fantasy pushed its way back into her heart with a vengeance.

She was at Granny's Diner when she saw the mayor again for the first time in weeks (which was surprising, considering how small the town was). As soon as the brunette walked into the establishment, Emma dropped her fork on the table and stared.

Looking confused at first, her friend whipped around to see what she was gawking at, and when she realized who had caught the woman's complete attention, she turned back to face her friend, looking slightly horrified.

"Emma,  _don't,_ " she pleaded. " _Please_ don't stare."

"I'm… I'm not staring…" the blonde replied absently, continuing to blatantly stare at the woman as she ordered her coffee.

"Emma!" Ruby snapped, kicking Emma hard under the table. "Knock it off!"

The woman was practically drooling and had no trouble ignoring the pain in her shin. Alas, there was nothing her friend could do to break her stare, and as the older brunette turned to walk out of the establishment, their eyes met. It seemed as though the mayor might drop her two cups of coffee – one for her and one for her lover, no doubt – but instead, she gripped them tighter and stared back at Emma, if only for a short moment. When she finally managed to break the gaze, the mayor hurried through the front door and out onto the street.

"You have a girlfriend!" Ruby hissed, kicking the blonde again, harder that time.

"Technically, she's not my girlfriend. We never said that we were-"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now? You'd really jerk her around like that? That girl is an  _angel,_ Emma, and if you can't be faithful, you don't fucking deserve her."

"WHOA, dude. Relax," Emma replied, finally shaking herself out of the daze she'd been in. "I'm not being unfaithful. We never said we were exclusive, and like you said, it's not happening anyway. Like, ever." When her friend said nothing, she added, "But I can dream."

"How could you possibly want anything more than what Belle can offer you?"

"If you're so fucking in love with her, why don't you date her?!"

"I'm not in love with her! She's my friend! And I care about her!  _And_ you, believe it or not. You have no right to hurt her."

With a sigh, Emma huffed, "I'm not going to hurt her, okay? Nothing's going to happen between Madame Mayor and me. She's out of my league."

"You're disgusting, you know that? You don't deserve Belle at all. Jesus Christ, Emma. I thought I knew you, but this… this is messed up."

With that, Ruby shoved her plate away and left the restaurant, leaving Emma alone to contemplate her own words.

* * *

 

"Hey," Emma said slowly, as her lover stepped through her apartment door. "How are you?"

"I'm… okay…" Belle answered slowly, looking around as though she was nervous.

"What's the matter?"

"You're acting… kinda weird. On the phone today, you-"

"Hey, listen. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be short with you. I've just had a lot on my mind is all."

"Okay… Well, why don't we talk about it?"

"I, uh… I don't really feel like… talking..."

"Alright. That's fine. We can just-"

When Emma's lips crashed against her own, Belle gasped and watched wide-eyed as the woman backed her against the wall and pressed their bodies together.

"Emma, what the-"

"Belle," the blonde whispered. "Kiss me."

Startled but aroused by her lover's forwardness and lustful enthusiasm, the brunette acquiesced to the request and allowed her hands to slip behind Emma's back. Soon, their tongues were tangled together, and they were both swallowing each other's soft, contented moans.

"God, Emma," Belle gasped, as the woman's lips fell to her neck. "What's gotten into you?"

"I am so fucking horny," Emma confessed, then caught the woman's lips again, kissing her so hard they nearly bruised.

"I… I like this side of you."

"Good. I doubt you'll see it very often, but I just can't put it away today."

"I don't want you to put it away. I want you to make love to me."

Once they lay spent in each other's arms, wrapped only in the sheets on Emma's bed, Belle's breathing slowed.

Just when Emma became unsure if the woman was falling asleep, she whispered, "You awake?" Her lover nodded weakly, so she continued, asking, "Would you, um… Would you say that we're… going steady?"

"What?"

"You know. Like… Like officially a couple."

"I don't know. Do you feel that way?"

"I… I don't know. I just-"

"Emma… What's bothering you?"

"Nothing. It's nothing. Do you want to go again?"

As soon as the blonde tried to change the subject, Belle replied, "No. Talk to me."

"Are we… Are we exclusive?" Emma finally asked.

"I'm not sleeping with anyone else, if that's what you're asking."

"Oh."

After a silence, the brunette asked, "Were you worried that I was? Is that what this is about? You being jealous?"

"I'm not jealous!"

"Is that what you were worried about or not?"

"Well… No. I just… I just wanted to know if… if you would, I guess."

"As far as I know, you and I have never agreed to be exclusive."

"Oh."

"Oh what?"

"Just… Oh."

"Did you think we were?"

"No. I was just wondering."

"Yes, Emma. If I wanted to sleep with someone else, I would." When the blonde said nothing in reply, she added, "Do you know why?"

"Because you can do what you want? You're a smart, beautiful, independent woman?"

"No. Because you've never asked me not to."

"And I'm not going to."

"Why?"

"Because I don't need this to be exclusive to know that you care about me and that you want to be here with me."

"I feel the same way."

"So… So we're… kind of going steady… but not exclusive?"

"Yeah. I guess you could say that." After a long bout of silence, Belle told her lover, "I'm glad you're here with me, Emma."

"Me too, hun. Me too."

As true as that may have been, Emma still dreamt of the mayor while holding the librarian in her arms.

* * *

 

"Hello," the mayor said, appearing behind Emma in the diner and causing her head to whip around to find the sound.

As soon as she saw the beautiful woman, the blonde's mouth began to water.

"H-Hi," she stammered, spilling her coffee all over the counter as she moved to turn fully. "Oh, shit!"

"I've got it dear," the restaurant's patron said, touching Emma's hand. "No problem."

"Th-Thank you, Granny. I'm r-really s-sorry."

"Oh, good Lord, hun. What's gotten into you, hmm? You've suddenly got a stutter now?"

Face as red as it could possibly be, the younger woman looked down and tried to avoid all eye contact. Luckily, this worked, but it didn't stop Granny from laughing. Once the mess was cleaned up, the mayor addressed her again.

"So, are you always this clumsy?"

"Well… Not  _always…_ "

"In other words… Yes?" Emma shrugged her shoulders and looked away again, but this time, Regina boldly caught her chin and lifted it until their gazes met and said, "Everyone in this town is afraid of me. You shouldn't be."

"Ruby's not afraid of you," Emma answered quickly. "Hey, wait. I'm not afraid of you! I just spilled my coffee and… and…"

Rolling her eyes, the mayor sat down on the stood next to her and replied, "That is because Ruby and I have an understanding."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. Anyhow-"

"I sh-should get going."

"Suddenly shy, are we?"

"I'm n-not shy! I-"

"I've missed seeing you at the bar."

Emma's stomach flipped, and as usual, she began to stare.

"You, uh… You have other company, it seems."

"And?"

"So why would you want me around when you already have-"

"Am I not allowed to enjoy the company of more than one person?"

This caught Emma off guard, so she simply parted her lips as though she was about to speak but remained silent.

"Not that it's significant… but I will have you know that I rarely drank or went to bars before I saw you there. I just happened to have shown up that night, for the first time in a long time, and there you were."

Mouth still slightly agape, the blonde managed only, "I, uh…"

"You're not very articulate right now, are you?"

"N-No… I guess not."

"Something bothering you?"

"Absolutely not."

"Something pleasing you beyond the point of speech?" Regina asked with a wink.

The woman's teasing was too much, and Emma felt her face grow hot with embarrassment. What could she say? Nothing, really. Nothing that wouldn't make her feel like a complete idiot.

She settled on, "I suppose you could say that."

"So, I'll see you tonight?"

"Huh?"

"I'll be there around nine."

With that, the mayor turned and left the building.

* * *

 

Emma debated telling Ruby what had happened, but given the woman's complete disgust with her, she decided against making that particular phone call. Instead, she stood in front of the mirror agonizing over what to wear (which was a strange and rare occurrence). Eventually, she decided on a tightly fitting tank top and a pair of denim shorts, which were a little more revealing than she was comfortable with wearing.

Her knees felt weak as she stepped into the bar, and as soon as she saw the mayor's head turn to look towards the door, her stomach flipped.

"Hi," she said slowly, upon approaching the woman who was sitting gracefully on the stool in front of her.

"Well, hello there. I was beginning to wonder if you were going to show."

"How could I not?" Emma asked, finally smiling.

The mayor smiled back, a slight, sly smile that sent shivers down the younger woman's spine.

Whispering the words in Emma's ear as she took the woman's hand, Regina said, "Dance with me."

"Where's Mr. Lover Boy?" Emma finally asked, after the second song had ended and sweat had built up on her brow.

"What? Oh. Him. He's working."

"What's his name?"

Regina raised her eyebrows and looked at her dance partner.

"Any particular reason why you feel the need to know that information?"

"I could ask anyone in town. But I'm not. I'm asking you."

"His name is Graham."

"He's hideous."

Of course, the mayor burst out laughing at this comment and shook her head, stating, "You're jealous."

"I am  _not_ jealous."

" _And_ you're a bad liar."

"Excuse me! I'll have you know that I-"

"Honestly, though. I think you're jealous of him."

"There's nothing to be jealous of. He fell out of a fucking ugly tree, and you're here with me anyway."

"Perhaps I just needed someone to fill my spare time with."

This obviously stung Emma deeply, so she looked away and said, "You know what? That's exactly what it is. Should have figured that out sooner."

Forcing a bitter laugh, the blonde walked back towards the bar. It took a few minutes, but eventually, the mayor appeared beside her and ordered a drink before turning to look into her bright green eyes.

"I didn't mean that."

"That doesn't sound like much of an apology."

"I'm…"

When she realized that the mayor was clearly not used to giving such apologies, Emma laughed and shook her head, saying, "Whatever. I should get going."

"Emma, wait," Regina said quickly, grabbing the woman's wrist as she stood to leave.

"Did you want to say something else?"

"I didn't come here just to be entertained. I came here for you."

"That's funny. You seemed to be coming here for someone else a few weeks ago."

"You are so fucking bitter. Can't you just accept the fact that I'm here with you right now?" the mayor snapped. Then, she stepped forward slowly and put her hand on the younger woman's waist, assuring her, "It's just us tonight."

As jealous as she was, and as bitter as she was, the fluttering in her heart made it impossible for Emma to pull away. Instead, she nodded her head slowly and pulled the woman back onto the dance floor.

* * *

 

The scene repeated on a series of nights, until finally, Regina gathered the bravery to walk the blonde out to her car.

"Have a good night, Regina," Emma said with a smile, opening the car door.

Before she could get inside, though, the mayor put her hand on top of Emma's, holding it against the frame of the door.

"Wait."

Her face betraying her surprise immediately, Emma turned around to find that the woman was standing dangerously close. Before she could pull away or make a sound, Regina's lips were pressed against hers in a soft, slow kiss.

"Goodnight, Emma," she whispered, her breath hot on the shell of the woman's ear.

She was gone before the blonde could reply.

* * *

 

"You did  _what?_ " Ruby screamed, gaping at her best friend as the woman sat across from her at the dining room table.

" _I_ didn't!  _She_ did! I just… enjoyed it…"

"How can you-"

"Belle and I aren't exclusive."

"Does she know that?!"

"Jesus fucking Christ, Ruby. Settle the fuck down.  _Yes,_ she knows that. Not only does she know that, but she feels the same way."

"Which is what, exactly?"

"That we don't have to be exclusive to enjoy each other's company or care about each other."

"Oh, so you  _do_ care about Belle. Could've fooled me."

" _What_ is your  _problem?_  It's not your relationship! Why do you care?"

"Because I care about her. And I care about you. I don't want to see either of you get hurt."

"If she's not exclusive either, she's not going to get-"

"She's not seeing anyone else."

"She might not be seeing anyone, but she definitely said we don't need to be exclusive. Her words."

"Have you taken a second to think that maybe she just said that so you wouldn't run?"

Emma's jaw dropped.

"Ruby. You need to back off. Right now."

"Have you ever thought that maybe she thought that that was what  _you_ wanted? Not what she wanted?"

"Ruby…"

"You're being a selfish little bitch right now. I feel like I don't even know you."

"Me? Is that a joke? You've been keeping secrets since I came back here."

Staring blankly and immediately starting to sweat, Ruby asked defensively, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that I can tell you're keeping things from me. I don't know what, but I know you well enough to realize when you're full of shit. You want me to tell you everything, but you flip out when I do, and then you don't tell me jack shit."

"I'm not… keeping things from you…"

"You're lying."

"Look, fuck this. Fuck you. Fuck this whole thing. Just  _don't_ fuck up with Belle."

"What is your issue with Belle? Like, really? What are you not telling me?"

"This isn't about Belle. I'm trying to help you, okay? I'm trying to help you both. If you go for Regina, you're going to get hurt. I promise."

"Fuck you. I don't know why you can't stand to see me happy."

"Emma! Please. I'm serious. Just listen to me, okay? I'm honestly trying to be a good friend to you guys."

"Listen to you? When you're full of shit and keeping things from me?"

"Emma…"

" _What?_ "

"She loves you." When Emma shook her head in disbelief, Ruby added, "She told me herself."

"…Oh, fuck."

* * *

 

"What's the matter, honey?" Belle asked her lover, stroking some of the blonde locks of hair away from the woman's face.

"Nothing."

"Emma?"

"It's nothing."

With a sigh, Belle leaned back into Emma's arms and shut her eyes.

"Belle?" the blonde finally asked, after a long bout of silence.

"Yeah?"

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

"What?" the woman asked, sitting up straight and turning to look at her partner.

"Is there something you're not telling me?"

"You saw Ruby today, didn't you?"

"Yeah, so?"

"What the hell did she say?"

Eyebrows raised, Emma quickly replied, "What can't you tell me that you can tell her?"

Realizing just how hypocritical this was, Emma blushed and looked away, saying nothing else.

"It's not like that! Emma, please… I…"

"No, it's fine. Everyone keeps things from me. Why shouldn't you?"

"Emma… Please…"

"You should go. I'm not in a very good mood, and you're not going to like me when I'm like this."

With a sigh, Belle stood, leaned over to place a kiss on the woman's forehead, then left the apartment.

* * *

 

Neither Belle nor Emma spoke to each other over the next few days, so on the third night without contact, the blonde found herself at the bar, alone, with a drink in her hand.

"Hey, stranger," a voice behind her said. "Long time no see."

"Yeah," Emma agreed, turning around slowly after downing the rest of the drink. "Last week."

"I upset you, didn't I?"

"No, not really. Why? Did I seem upset?"

"Well, no… You, um… You actually seemed sort of giddy… But then I didn't hear from you."

"Hear from me? You realize you've never given me your number, right?" Emma laughed.

"You know it's in the phone book under 'Mayor's Office,' right?"

The blonde's smile grew to match the brunette's as their eyes locked.

Eventually, Regina broke the silence by playfully asking, "So, are you just going to sit there, or are you going to dance with me?"

"I guess I could give you one dance."

Their teasing lasted the rest of the night, as usual, but this time, the tension between them was heightened. Every time Regina got close to her, Emma wondered if a kiss would follow. It didn't, but throughout the night, their dancing became closer and more sensual, until the mayor was completely backed against the younger woman, grinding on her as the blonde pulled her closer with her hands on her hips.

By the time Regina turned back around to face her again, they were both sweating. They hardly noticed when the bartender announced last call. It was only when the people around them started to disperse that they realized how late it had gotten.

"I don't want tonight to end," Emma sighed, as they stepped out into the cold night air.

"It doesn't have to."

"What?"

"Come home with me."

"But you-"

"He doesn't have to know." When Emma said nothing and stared at her in dumbfounded surprise, not knowing what to do or say, Regina added, "What about yours?"

"What?"

"What about your lady?"

"My… Oh. I… Wait. How did you know about that?"

"What, you weren't going to tell me?"

"Well, to be fair, it's not really any of your business. It's not like we're-"

"Aren't we?"

Emma paused.

"Well?"

The blonde finally answered with, "We're not… exclusive."

Regina laughed and asked, "So who else are you seeing?"

"Uh… You, I guess. Sort of."

"Sort of?"

"Well, Jesus, Regina! I don't know! What the fuck is this?"

"It's us, Emma. Just us."

"That's… not an answer…"

"You're making this-"

"I might be in an open relationship, but from what I understand, you're not. So what is this, really?"

"It's me wanting you. Don't make this more complicated than it has to be. He doesn't have to know." Again, Emma said nothing, so she urged her, "Come home with me."

"He's not gonna come home with a shotgun and blow me out of the bed, is he?" the blonde joked.

"He doesn't live with me."

"What?"

"We're not that serious, honestly. I mean, we're supposed to me monogamous, but our relationship is… complicated."

"So is ours."

"Look, it's fucking freezing out. Are you coming or not? Don't make me stand here in the cold begging you like an idiot. Just make up your mind. Are you in?"

"I'm about to be."

With a wink, Emma quickly got into her car and turned the key in the ignition, then followed the mayor back to the mansion on Mifflin Street.

* * *

 

"Oh, fuck," the mayor groaned loudly. "God, Emma."

The blonde pulled away and told her, "I've waited so long for this," then resumed moving her tongue over the woman's swollen clit.

"I have too. Fuck… Don't stop."

Emma savored every taste and sensation that came from going down on the mayor, until the woman finally reached her climax and grabbed onto her shoulders, digging her nails into soft, pale skin. This earned a hiss of both pain and pleasure from the younger woman, and upon hearing this, Regina pulled her up, kissed her hard, then flipped their bodies so that she was on top.

"I'm gonna make you come so fucking hard," the mayor promised, pinning Emma's wrists above her head.

"I'm stronger than you," the woman laughed, lifting her arms and pushing the brunette away.

"Are you?"

It took merely seconds for Regina to pin her again, this time with more force than her partner could fight. She looked surprised, and even a little scared, which caused the mayor to smirk triumphantly as she pressed their hips together. The friction earned a soft moan from the blonde, who immediately relaxed into the mattress.

"Not so confident now, are we?" Regina teased. "I might be smaller than you, but that doesn't mean I can't fuck you so hard you wake up sometime in next week."

Blushing brightly and feeling rather intimidated by the woman's confidence, Emma simply licked her lips and allowed the mayor to work her magic.

Of course, the chemistry was explosive between them, and they both came harder than they ever had, nearly at the same time, when they finished, leaving them both gasping for breath as they lie naked in each other's arms.

"How the hell do you do that?" Emma asked breathlessly.

"I could ask you the same, darling."

Regina's hand tucked a few strands of hair behind the woman's ear, earning a smile from her lover.

"I still don't want tonight to end."

"It still doesn't have to. I'm happy to go again. Once I catch my breath, that is."

* * *

 

"I can't, Ruby," Emma cried. "I can't handle it! I can't think about her being with someone else. Fucking someone else."

"You slept with her, didn't you?"

"Yes."

"She's with Graham!"

"That doesn't matter. She wanted to, so we did."

"Emma! That's-"

"Can you, like, not judge me right now, please? I need a friend, okay?"

Sighing, Ruby replied, "I know, Em. I know." The brunette wrapped her arm around her friend's shoulders and gave a gentle squeeze before saying, "It's gonna be okay."

"I need to let her go. I can't do this. I can't compete with him. It hurts. I thought it would be fine, but it's not."

"Imagine how Belle would feel."

"Ruby! I don't need this right now, okay? This woman is… There's just something about her. I can't explain it. I feel like I've known her forever. Like we're a collision course that's impossible to avoid. You know?"

"Yeah, Em… I know…"

* * *

 

"I can't do this," Emma said into the phone, as soon as the woman on the other line answered.

"Sorry… You can't do what, exactly?"

"This. You. Us."

"Okay… Why?"

"Because I can't, Regina. I just can't."

"Tell me why."

"Because you have Graham. And I won't compete."

"So you'll sleep with two people, but I can't?"

There was a pause before Emma said, "I didn't say it was rational. It's just how I feel."

"Maybe I don't want to share you either."

"That's not fair. You know that I-"

"It's perfectly fair. It's the exact same thing. You're using a double standard to-"

"Leave him."

"What?"

"Just leave him."

"Leave her!"

"You first."

"You sound like a fucking child, for God's sake! Why don't you just—Oh, shit. I have to go."

When the receiver clicked, Emma started to cry.

* * *

 

"Oh, honey," Ruby sighed, rubbing her friend's back slowly as she let the woman sob. "I'm sorry."

"I don't know what's wrong with me. Belle is wonderful. She should be enough. But I just can't let Regina go. I can't. I can't do it. I can't. Ruby… I-"

"Shh. I know, hun. I know. You'll figure it out. I'm just it'll pass. Just hang in there, okay? Everyone has moments of-"

"No, Ruby. This isn't going away. I have to tell Belle."

"No! Emma, do  _not_ tell Belle. You will break her fucking heart."

"I can't not! I'm not a liar like you, Ruby."

"I'm not lying to you!"

"What aren't you telling me then?"

"Emma…"

"Ruby! You can't keep whatever it is away from me forever."

"Alright! Alright. I didn't want to tell you, because… because…"

"Just tell me!"

"I was with Belle before."

"What?"

"We were a couple, for a few months, while you were in Boston."

"What the fuck, Ruby! Why didn't you just tell me?"

"Because I didn't want it to change how you felt about Belle! I knew she would be good for you. And I thought you'd be good for her too…"

"Then why did you two split?"

"We're just not compatible. It was mutual."

"Why didn't  _she_ tell me? Oh, for fuck's sake!"

When Ruby realized what the woman was frantically digging for in her bag, she grabbed the woman's wrist.

"Emma, don't! Don't call her right now. Do  _not_ get pissed at her for this. She didn't want it to change anything between you. We didn't keep this from you to hurt you."

"Well, what the fuck else are you keeping from me then? Are you sleeping with my mom or something?"

"No! Jesus, Emma! What the hell!"

"What  _is_ it? What the fuck is going on?"

"I can't… Emma, I really, really  _can't_ talk to you about some things. Some things just… need to stay… not… said…"

"Nice, Ruby. Really nice. Best friends, huh? Seriously. Get the fuck out."

"Emma, please-"

"No, really. Get the fuck out."

"WAIT. Em… I'll tell you."

"All of it."

"All of it."

"Alright. Go."

"Don't freak out, okay? You have to promise not to freak out."

Rolling her eyes, Emma said, "I promise not to freak out."

"Before you left for Boston… you and Regina…"

"What? I didn't know Regina before-"

"Listen. You and Regina were lovers."

"Ruby… You're freaking me out…"

"You know Doctor Whale, right?"

"Well, yeah. We're friendly acquaintances. Why?"

"You know what he does, though?"

"Yeah, but… Wait."

"Emma… Don't freak-"

"YOU DIDN'T FUCKING TELL ME?!"

"Em, please! I couldn't! YOU told me not to! You made me promise! You said never, ever, ever was I  _ever_ supposed to let you remember her."

"But I did fucking remember her, didn't I? And you fucking knew it! You knew as soon as I saw her that I was in love with her!"

"Emma, just because-"

"And now I know why."

"You broke up for a reason."

"Oh, yeah? Why? Because we're both hot-headed women who make decisions on impulse?"

"No! Because you were hurting each other. It was a toxic relationship, and you both wanted it to end."

"I don't believe you."

"I'm telling you the truth now, and you don't even want to believe it. That's just  _great._ I wish you'd just fucking listen to me for once."

"I need to see her."

"Emma, no. Don't do this. It's going to end up the exact same way! It already is. Her never making compromises. You in tears. That's how it's always been. Please, don't choose that life over the one you have with Belle."

"I'm not in love with Belle, Ruby. I love her, but I'm not  _in_ love with her. I'm in love with Regina. And it all makes sense now. Why would I fall in love with her all over again, if it wasn't meant to be?"

"You're not in love. You said yourself that you were just infatuated."

"That was when I first met her!" the blonde cried, throwing her phone across the room. "Or at least… when I met her again. How could you let me fall for her like that and  _not tell me?_ "

"You made me promise!"

"I don't care. I don't fucking care."

"Emma."

"I need to see her."

"Please, don't."

"I know you're trying to help me. I know you are. But I need to at least try to get her back. I don't believe in coincidences. If we fell in love once, and we're falling in love again, it's not happening for no reason."

"How do you know it's mutual?"

"That's a horrible fucking thing to say."

"Well? How do you know she feels the same way?"

"I guess I don't. But we're about to find out."

Emma left Ruby sitting dumbfounded in her seat as she walked out of the apartment.

* * *

 

Throwing open the door to the mayor's office, Emma announced (rather loudly), "I need you to leave him."

"Emma, this is neither the time nor the place to-"

"No. It has to be now."

"Does it have to be  _here?_ " the mayor hissed. "Jesus, Emma! Can we at least take this outside?"

"Embarrassed of me?"

"No! I just  _work_ here!"

"Fine. Meet me at my car. I'm parked around back."

As soon as Regina sat down in the car and shut the door, Emma turned and looked at her intently.

"I'm serious. I need you to leave him."

"Because your jealousy is eating you alive, and you're selfishly wanting me all to yourself?"

"Do you love him?"

"What?"

"Do you love him, Regina?"

"Well… No…"

"Then WHY in God's name are you with him?"

"Because he's safe, Emma. He's safe."

"And I'm not?"

"No. You and I… We're…"

"Don't say different."

"I was going to say 'explosive and volatile,' but different is true too."

"Regina…"

"I'm not leaving him."

"I have to tell you something."

"Look, if this is-"

"I knew you before I moved to Boston."

"What?"

"We were lovers."

"Um…"

"You know Doctor Whale?"

"What about him?" the mayor asked slowly. Then, when it hit her, she said, "Oh… Oh, God."

"So… So what do we do now?"

"What do you mean? We stop seeing each other. If it didn't work the first time, it's not going to work now."

"What makes you so sure?"

"History repeats itself."

"Not always."

"How are we supposed to learn from our mistakes when we don't even remember them?"

"The biggest mistake I made is letting you go."

"Emma…" Regina sighed. "Fuck. Don't talk like that."

"Leave him. Be with me. Let's try this again."

"And Belle?"

"I'll tell her."

"What? Really?"

"I'm in love with you, Regina. All over again."

"I'm…"

After a long pause, Emma became anxious and said sadly, "You're not."

"No, it's not that! I… I am…"

Emma kissed her with fire and threaded her fingers through her hair to pull her closer.

"I love you," she whispered against the woman's full lips. "Stay with me."

"I will."


End file.
